When Ryan and I first got married, sex was easy! Can I get an AMEN! It was easy to jump in the sack with my hubby. Now, my children are a little older, so their ears are listening to our every sound that thuds from the bedroom and their eyeballs are inspecting our every grope. We’ve had to get a little imaginative when it comes to nourishing our marriage and balancing intimacy and parenting. Here are our “Top Secret” 5 ways we are sneaking in the good deed.
- Establish A Strict Bedtime
You will never get a chance to relax and turn “things” on with littles running around. Set a time for every night that the kids start to get ready for bed and be firm with these times. Also, let the children know there will be consequences if they do not follow the bedtime rules. In our house, 7:30 is the IT time to start getting ready for bed. By 8:00 they are in bed lights off. An established bedtime allows a good hour to pass for them to fall asleep and create a more private experience with your hubby. Sex, when all the kids are sound asleep, is much easier. Don’t wake them, but have fun!
- The Shower Makes A Great Hiding Spot
The shower wasn’t intended just to wash up in on a daily basis. Well, maybe it was but not in this house. Can you pass me the soap, baby? <<< (Insert Wink face here) Sex doesn’t always have to last for hours and hours or be planned romantically. Have a quick rendezvous with your hubby while getting ready for the day. My husband often takes his shower after work when the kids are already upstairs getting ready for bed. The baby is sound asleep, and the older children are snuggled in bed reading for the night, why not slip in and surprise him. ( Just don’t’ slip) Plus, you get to take that shower you might have missed out on previously in the day. Don’t forget about this great space to squeeze time in with your hubby.
- Get A Babysitter
DATE, DATE, DATE. Never stop dating your husband. It is IMPERATIVE that you set romantic time for just the two of you. Get a sitter at least once a month for a hot date with your husband. Take turns each month to plan a night out. Dating is a great way to rekindle that spark and not worry about children opening the door to your bedroom. You can be as loud as you want and as creative as you’d like. We like to have the kids go to the grandparents for an overnight. That way the house is all to ourselves if we stay home or we have a quiet house to return to after a hot night on the town.
Take Advantage Of His Lunch Break
The kids are at school; the baby is still asleep from his morning nap, why not text him some sexy thoughts you have in mind and ask him to eat in for lunch. This will surely get the juices flowing and bring your man home for a sexy quickie with his thoughtful wife. Don’t’ forget to send him off with something to eat. It’s a win-win for all.
Intimacy Doesn’t Always Have To Involve Sex
There are many ways to meet your sexual desires with your husband that don’t involve the actual act of sex. I flirt with my husband all the time. I work at keeping the spark alive, and when the right time allows, (in the car, bedroom, on a date, cooking in the kitchen, taking turns putting the kids to bed), I play with him and have fun. Whisper sexy thoughts in his ear, kiss his neck gently promising a fun evening later. I make it fun and sexy. Working each other up can be just as fun as jumping into the sheets. When the right moment comes along, the experience will be magnified immensely. So remember to have fun and think outside of the box.
I have talked with my children about my relationship with my husband. I don’t feel children need to see their parents have sex or even hear them. I assure you it will happen no matter how hard you try. But, children need to see what a happy marriage looks like. It’s okay to flirt (PG RATED of course), kiss each other and always embrace one another. When kids see their parents love on each other, it creates a stable, loving environment for them. So let them see you cherish one another.